written on July 21st 2009...
Dev, aka Krish, is now 3yr old and has been going to kindergarten from March.. Its been 4 months now and I keep wondering if Im doing right sending him to this school in Germany.. where he is not even speaking English... how will he shape up, and adjust to Indian Education System(IES)...
Yes, IES, is my biggest worry, esp after interacting with my friends back home, how and what they are doing things in Indian schools...
My thought process is changing..
eg. Yesterday he couldnt stop his poo and did it in his pants in KG and they just MENTIONED it... I was very upset... and kept on telling him on the way back home, at home his father also said the same "strictly"(atleast he thought so...). Today morning I told them while dropping him, that I hope he would mention it today and not pee/poo in pants...
The instructors response - You MUST not talk over it so much.. then he would start thinking that its not good, he might just stop the natural process... Once in a while accident happen with all children.. I mentioned it only FYI...
Initially, I used to get very insecured as he kept on crying for almost 2 months while dropping him to KG... other kids were fine.. or took lesser time to adjust... Later did I realise, that not just the place, the surrounding even the language was new to him... He couldnt COMMUNICATE... After 3 mnths he started speaking & now he is unstoppable!!!!!!!!
So the feedback is given only as FACTS... your child does this and that.. but its not abnormal, many other kids do it... few take time to "understand' or "behave" as we expect them to... ...thats the whole problem - WE EXPECT a LOT and keep expecting forever... whether the child is going to the KG or +2 or entrance...So, Im changing lot of my home-schooling tactics with him as Im seeing lot of +ve progress in my child...
I always thought Indian Education System is the best as, all across the globe the Indian professionals find it easier to establish themselves, only to realise that things are not that rosy as its seen from outside...
When it comes to educating a child, NOTHING is PERFECT/ as per BOOKS... every child NEEDS to be handled differently, every child has his/her UNIQNESS and that needs to be harnessed... Let the flower grow on its own, u just keep watering and manuring it "as and when required".. too must of either/both will just not be able to make it bloom well...I hope the school and home both understand this and either has to be more supportive to the child...
Instructing a child is easier in school than at home:
Ive concluded this from my experience about child learning in school and home.....When we try to educate our child, he/she sees us as Mom and many a times its like ok I shouldnt do it... but he might not be "SCARED/bothered" to repeat the same action again........ For a TEACHER in SCHOOL its rather easier, as there are RULES and every child has to FOLLOW the RULES... A child may not do it the first time, second or third but seeing the other kids do, he eventually does the same things DAILY... And thats what a montessory teacher is TRAINED for... Moreover she sees more children each passing year and she should be smart enough to chalk out a pattern of behaviour amongst children - like restlessness, or interests... If she is getting impatient its her FLAW not the child's.... A child is like a wet clay, he is just MOULDED by the teacher and parent alike, but at a very different platform....
The process of giving or taking FEEDBACK should be more FACTUAL rather than OPINIONised... It should be a CHART with a CURVE of progress, which may vary wrt to the area of interest and also diff for diff child.... & most imp at this stage of life both Parents & Teacher MUST understand this!!!.
In any case, a child must never be HIT/ BEATEN up, wether in school or at home!!! .. I really do not know if I shall be able to keep my own words.
Talk things over to the child.. he should not get aloof and avoid telling parents the TRUTH by parent's reaction.... and be sure no one ever DARES to come near to that level with any child...
Actually, I keep asking for feedback on Krish's "talkative" attitude.. and what I should do to keep him quiet... The teacher is rather happy that he is so expressive .. Im sure in India I would have got a baggage of "complains" by now...Infact they said, its wonderful that he can mix English and German and even mother tongue simultaneously....
Once he wanted the book on Dogs... the teacher couldnt understand what "Dog" means... yeah she is Japanese and speaks only German-Japanese.. .. so this boy smartly went to her.. took 1 book... pointed to that and said.. "BOW BOW" where.. with all actions!!!!!!!!!!! ........... hahaha...
Rectifying children too much and restricting them from doing what they otherwise would do naturally is a "CRIME"... I know its a very strong word.... but if we keep on saying DONT... eg. dont throw, dont jump, dont spil... how else will they be able to EXPLORE themselves and DECIDE what they should do / WANT to do???In India, everything is expected from a child at a very early age... whether its holding a pen/coloring/writing.. Im not against it or for it.. or debating the eductaion system... What Im saying is as parents or teacher we must accept few FACTS as it is...Like, its very normal for a 3-4 yr old to roam around and not being able to sit at a place... When a teacher complains this to the parent, how can she NOT understand that!!!! So, saying the child is wrong/ taking a tone of complaining... At this age if he gets this kind of feeling, he might grow up to hate the whole process of schooling.... ...
Here, Im worried that Krish is 'lacking' in academics compared to any 3 yr old in India... as in writting alphabets/numbers... I keep telling his instructor to make him hold the pen... but they just refuse to do so.. REASON - he doesnt want to.. & more u force a child to do something more he revolts from doing it.. LET HIM TAKE HIS TIME... we have no problem in progressing at his PACE.. you MUST not FORCE him.. They say, he SPEAKS better than anyone else in his class... He speaks German and English exactly the way teacher pronounces, he repeats new words and remembers well where and how to apply them... Many 3 yr old wont do that... He is good with puzzels, blocks and fixing and breaking and then refixing kind of stuff, rather than sitting at a place and color... He colors not more than 2 min.. that too rarely...So, a child just needs some sweet words for encouragement and patience... one cannot expect a 3-4 yr old behave like adults sitting at a place and color to perfection one whole sheet!!!
Yes, IES, is my biggest worry, esp after interacting with my friends back home, how and what they are doing things in Indian schools...
My thought process is changing..
eg. Yesterday he couldnt stop his poo and did it in his pants in KG and they just MENTIONED it... I was very upset... and kept on telling him on the way back home, at home his father also said the same "strictly"(atleast he thought so...). Today morning I told them while dropping him, that I hope he would mention it today and not pee/poo in pants...
The instructors response - You MUST not talk over it so much.. then he would start thinking that its not good, he might just stop the natural process... Once in a while accident happen with all children.. I mentioned it only FYI...
Initially, I used to get very insecured as he kept on crying for almost 2 months while dropping him to KG... other kids were fine.. or took lesser time to adjust... Later did I realise, that not just the place, the surrounding even the language was new to him... He couldnt COMMUNICATE... After 3 mnths he started speaking & now he is unstoppable!!!!!!!!
So the feedback is given only as FACTS... your child does this and that.. but its not abnormal, many other kids do it... few take time to "understand' or "behave" as we expect them to... ...thats the whole problem - WE EXPECT a LOT and keep expecting forever... whether the child is going to the KG or +2 or entrance...So, Im changing lot of my home-schooling tactics with him as Im seeing lot of +ve progress in my child...
I always thought Indian Education System is the best as, all across the globe the Indian professionals find it easier to establish themselves, only to realise that things are not that rosy as its seen from outside...
When it comes to educating a child, NOTHING is PERFECT/ as per BOOKS... every child NEEDS to be handled differently, every child has his/her UNIQNESS and that needs to be harnessed... Let the flower grow on its own, u just keep watering and manuring it "as and when required".. too must of either/both will just not be able to make it bloom well...I hope the school and home both understand this and either has to be more supportive to the child...
Instructing a child is easier in school than at home:
Ive concluded this from my experience about child learning in school and home.....When we try to educate our child, he/she sees us as Mom and many a times its like ok I shouldnt do it... but he might not be "SCARED/bothered" to repeat the same action again........ For a TEACHER in SCHOOL its rather easier, as there are RULES and every child has to FOLLOW the RULES... A child may not do it the first time, second or third but seeing the other kids do, he eventually does the same things DAILY... And thats what a montessory teacher is TRAINED for... Moreover she sees more children each passing year and she should be smart enough to chalk out a pattern of behaviour amongst children - like restlessness, or interests... If she is getting impatient its her FLAW not the child's.... A child is like a wet clay, he is just MOULDED by the teacher and parent alike, but at a very different platform....
The process of giving or taking FEEDBACK should be more FACTUAL rather than OPINIONised... It should be a CHART with a CURVE of progress, which may vary wrt to the area of interest and also diff for diff child.... & most imp at this stage of life both Parents & Teacher MUST understand this!!!.
In any case, a child must never be HIT/ BEATEN up, wether in school or at home!!! .. I really do not know if I shall be able to keep my own words.
Talk things over to the child.. he should not get aloof and avoid telling parents the TRUTH by parent's reaction.... and be sure no one ever DARES to come near to that level with any child...
Actually, I keep asking for feedback on Krish's "talkative" attitude.. and what I should do to keep him quiet... The teacher is rather happy that he is so expressive .. Im sure in India I would have got a baggage of "complains" by now...Infact they said, its wonderful that he can mix English and German and even mother tongue simultaneously....
Once he wanted the book on Dogs... the teacher couldnt understand what "Dog" means... yeah she is Japanese and speaks only German-Japanese.. .. so this boy smartly went to her.. took 1 book... pointed to that and said.. "BOW BOW" where.. with all actions!!!!!!!!!!! ........... hahaha...
Rectifying children too much and restricting them from doing what they otherwise would do naturally is a "CRIME"... I know its a very strong word.... but if we keep on saying DONT... eg. dont throw, dont jump, dont spil... how else will they be able to EXPLORE themselves and DECIDE what they should do / WANT to do???In India, everything is expected from a child at a very early age... whether its holding a pen/coloring/writing.. Im not against it or for it.. or debating the eductaion system... What Im saying is as parents or teacher we must accept few FACTS as it is...Like, its very normal for a 3-4 yr old to roam around and not being able to sit at a place... When a teacher complains this to the parent, how can she NOT understand that!!!! So, saying the child is wrong/ taking a tone of complaining... At this age if he gets this kind of feeling, he might grow up to hate the whole process of schooling.... ...
Here, Im worried that Krish is 'lacking' in academics compared to any 3 yr old in India... as in writting alphabets/numbers... I keep telling his instructor to make him hold the pen... but they just refuse to do so.. REASON - he doesnt want to.. & more u force a child to do something more he revolts from doing it.. LET HIM TAKE HIS TIME... we have no problem in progressing at his PACE.. you MUST not FORCE him.. They say, he SPEAKS better than anyone else in his class... He speaks German and English exactly the way teacher pronounces, he repeats new words and remembers well where and how to apply them... Many 3 yr old wont do that... He is good with puzzels, blocks and fixing and breaking and then refixing kind of stuff, rather than sitting at a place and color... He colors not more than 2 min.. that too rarely...So, a child just needs some sweet words for encouragement and patience... one cannot expect a 3-4 yr old behave like adults sitting at a place and color to perfection one whole sheet!!!
